Words Can Speak Louder than Images

I think I've hit a writer's block as far as my blogging goes. I don't feel that relaying my daily activities for the week is that interesting to be honest! And being one who values people taking the time to read my blog, I'll try to step up my writings a bit...make them a bit more dynamic and fun to read. With that said, I'll share the highlights of my week, as opposed to being caught up in details for the week.

I've finally been officially hired as a Graduate Assistant with the University's Center on Disability Studies! I'm very happy and relieved to have the process over and done with. On Monday, I had to get a TB skin test read; my doctor suggested that if I could find someone on campus to read it for me, I could save myself a trip back to the doc's office.

My plan was to visit the training room at the athletic complex. The people there all know me, as I'm around the football team so much. So, I asked one of the athletic trainers if there was anyone available to read my TB test and was informed that the doctors would be in around 2 that afternoon, and that it would probably be best if they read it.

Considering I would be in class at that time, I quickly had to think of an alternative plan. I navigated my way up to the Student Health Center on campus, and found the staff there to be very helpful. A doctor read my test, and filled out a form saying I was cleared.

I then had to have another form notarized, which meant visiting another building with a qualified notary public. I got my form notarized and then proceeded to turn these into the CDS Administration Office. Finally, after many opportunities to run around like a chicken without a head, I had submitted all the forms required for my official hiring. Relief!

On Wednesday, I had a great day at Dr. Skouge's (Jim's) office. This week, Melissa and Lei, from Miloli'i (a small fishing village on the island of Hawaii) visited. They worked on editing pieces from their Summer Fun 2004 experiences. It was nice having their presence in the office. They're enthusiastic about learning and are genuinely happy to have the opportunities that they've been presented with. I received feedback on some work that I had started on from Jim; that was helpful. I now have a clear task that will take some time for me to complete, but it WILL get finished! I also duplicated more CDs for SpEd 480.

Later in the afternoon, I asked Jim if he could help recruit help for my bowling league on Saturday, as Mortar Board, the group who normally helps, had another event on the same day so finding volunteers from that source was difficult. Jim was more than willing to do this and he asked if I'd make a short announcement on video. Along with this announcement, I informed him that I had come up with a third installment of my peanut joke.

This peanut joke has taken on a life of its own! It started off innocently enough, where one day I told the joke to Jim and despite his failing to see the true humor in the joke, he suggested I deliver the joke to students in his class via video. I agreed to do so. The next week, I was fortunate enough to actually visit his class in-person as I wrote in my last entry. Along with my remarks about taking risks, I provided a second installment of this joke. It was never meant to take on a life of its own; it was more of an attempt to humor MYSELF! But, somehow his students found it funny, and as I told Jim, "the more I'm encouraged, the more I'll do!"

So, here I was delivering this third installment of this joke on video, and although it was somewhat amusing, I couldn't help but think, "How ridiculous has this become?!" I promised that this would be the last of the peanut joke. It's safe to say that I took the idea as far as I could and have now run it into the ground. There will be NO resurrection!

The company in the office, Melissa, Lei, and Steve, couldn't contain their laughter for a while. Jim and I sat there looking at each other, in disbelief that humor had been found in this joke, and eventually we couldn't stop laughing! Laughter is such a healthy activity; it allows one to feel happy and enter another world of sorts, one where there are no immediate problems or stress.

By the time we had completed making this video announcement, it was time for me to head to my late Wednesday class. I was geared up for class, ready to learn. I had eaten a meal, drank a soda, had a good laugh...things were good!

This week's class was in a new location, far removed from the cramped room we once occupied. Things looked to be good. I began to hit the obligatory wall around 7:45pm, my eyes suddenly became very heavy. Time had finally caught up to me. I might have nodded off for a minute or two; around 8pm I was alert once again, but my head had become sore. I felt an intense pressure just above my eye sockets. I had succumbed to a migraine headache; this one came out of nowhere! Somehow, I dug deep within and managed to endure the rest of class. We had small group discussion, and luckily I had done my homework and had prepared answers to share as it related to the case study we were looking at. It pays to be prepared! I mentioned nothing about not feeling good; complaining wouldn't help the matter any.

By the time class ended, it was about 9:15pm...this was probably the latest I've ever been on campus in a classroom...I was ready to get out of there! Some classmates were nice and accompanied me out of the building. On the way to the elevator, I nearly allowed my body to get the best of me; I felt nauseous and was ready to vomit. But, even though I felt really sick, I had much pride and felt I had to stay strong in order to not cause myself embarrassment. Perhaps this is where my ethnicity comes into play; Asians tend to be very proud people, they always strive to put their best foot forward. Somehow, someway, I managed to find my way to my ride and made the 30-minute trip home without throwing up.

Home was a much welcomed sight on this night. No sooner that I went into the house, I headed straight for my room and grabbed my emesis bowl. That night, I threw up a couple times; I felt a little better after that, though. I took some medicine, felt a little better and decided to try and carry out my normal routine of perusing my e-mail before bed. This probably was NOT the wisest of ideas, as I had to try really hard on focusing which in turned caused my head more stress. I felt really icky, so I figured I'd head to bed.

The next day, I was up in my chair by 5:30am. My parents said goodbye, and there I sat in the same position in which they left me until about noon; I fell asleep in my chair. I awoke to find my neck stiff, and my head stuffy. I still wasn't "right." I tried to eat lunch, but my appetite wasn't really present. Around 2:30pm, my mom called to check on me and asked if I wanted to lie down. I thought this might help my recovery so I agreed; my mom left work early and I was soon in bed sleeping.

I took about a 4 hour nap, awoke for dinner, ate a little and took more medicine. Earlier in the day, I had e-mailed Jim, alerting him of my situation but vowed that I would make it into work on Friday. Things looked bleak to be honest...prior to showering I felt nauseous yet again, and vomited quite a bit...it was NOT a pleasant sight. I showered, felt a little better, but nowhere near to feeling up to go out. I was determined to be well enough by Friday. There was a UH football scrimmage to attend, things to do at Jim's, and a volleyball social to attend with the Golden Key International Honour Society...I WAS going to be well by Friday!

I had a good night's sleep and awoke on Friday morning feeling all right! My head had finally cleared to the point that it wasn't bothering me much at all. Maybe just a faint sign of pain, nothing I couldn't handle.

The practice field of the UH football team was a great sight to behold on this day. It provides me with this odd sense of relaxation and happiness; I suppose this is in large part due to the fact I'm surrounded by people I genuinely enjoy and vice versa. There was a heightened sense of excitement in the air; players were excited about the scrimmage, the Scout Bowl, that was to take place.

Scout team players, players who simulate the opponent for the starters but see no game time action, would be provided with an opportunity to experience full-contact action. Contact is rarely seen at UH practices. The scrimmage was full of high energy, all out efforts, and hard hitting! A coach later commented to his colleagues, "This is the most excited that I've seen the guys in a while!" I would agree with that statement.

I approached a few of my friends on the team about helping at bowling, as this Saturday they had a rare day off since there was no game or practice to attend. All three of the guys said yes. I was excited about getting the help for one, and happy that they would see me participating in MY sport.

I had also recruited Mortar Board alumni to help out. A few replied saying they'd be happy to help. Things looked good! I sometimes over think things too much. Case and point: I was happy to have secured all this help, but I also felt a pressure to perform at my best. I didn't want to have a poor outing...I know the guys from the team would razz me if I bowled poorly, that's just a normal aspect of friendship!

On Friday, Jim relayed to me that one of his students was really interested about helping out on Saturday. He couldn't recall her name, but indicated that she might just show up. Even more pressure!

Friday was a fun day; I found out that I was officially hired as a GA by CDS. Phew! I also enjoyed the company of Melissa and Lei. They showed me their work that they had produced over the week; awesome stuff! I commented to them that they had produced something that was better than anything I had done, and I really meant this! Prior to this, Jim had asked me what I thought of the comments that his students had provided in response to the video pieces of mine that they watched the week prior.

The feedback was very overwhelming and a bit surprising to read. I suppose one doesn't truly realize the impact that s/he might have on others until they hear/read it from others themselves. The CD that the students were provided contained one of the word poetry pieces that they had watched when I visited their class. They could have easily skipped the second viewing, but from what I read in the comments provided, they took the time to watch it again. One student even had a significant other watch it as well. Jim commented, "You might just be onto something here! I want you to do more of these (word poetry pieces)."

I had created a DVD earlier in the week of my pieces. Jim had suggested that I show my work to Lei and Melissa. So, I set up the DVD and had it run. I think the Lei and Melissa enjoyed it; after it was finished, they asked if they could have a copy to take back to Miloli'i to share with the youth there. I was more than happy to oblige. I'm proud of this work and I'm happy that people want to share it with others.

Later in the day, they mentioned going to the volleyball game that night. I said I was going as well, so they insisted that Jim come along! Ultimately, Jim did make it to the game. I'm happy about this, since he's taking the time to have FUN!

An odd thing happened on Friday afternoon. Jim had moved into the computer lab for the day, as it was empty and provided him with a quiet environment to work in. The super computer I use was being utilized to create a DVD; Steven mentioned he had to make a DVD, so I suggested he use that computer, as it's the fastest one we have. I didn't mind at all; as Jim says, "We don't need ownership of everything!" In any case, I saw a chance to pretend to be a professor. An empty room, A/V equipment at my disposal, an audience...what more was needed?!

So, I asked Jim if I could show a DVD on the big screen; he said sure. Steven had come into the lab, and helped set things up as well. So, there I was...preparing to take on the role of professor. In order to believe it, you have to envision it first. "Good afternoon class, welcome to SpEd 480. My name's Mr. Kajiyama, but you can call me Brian...To start the semester, we'll be watching two video pieces." At this point, Jim realizes what's going on and calls a halt to everything. "C'mon, we have to do this right! We need an audience!" Not even a few seconds after hearing those words, here comes a group of about 15 people into the room! I'm thinking, "Holy cow, what the heck have I got myself into?!"

Jim introduces me very briefly and tells me to say something...talk about being put on the spot! I say something to the effect of "I'd appreciate any feedback after you watch these videos." The videos begin...the subject of these word poetry pieces aren't light at all; I make some strong accusatory statements through them.

The students sat there, probably caught off guard as to what they were watching. As it ends, I elicit feedback, much like Jim would do, "Okay, maybe we can go around and have each person share a little something that they felt after watching the videos." The first student said it had left her speechless, as it was such a powerful message. The next student also had positive comments. And then time had run out, Jim felt pressured to let them get to their class. Before everyone left, however, I received two more comments, one of which was to make these pieces multilingual, which is an excellent idea. I hope to explore this idea more in the near future. Another student mentioned that he works at a middle school and that his students would benefit a lot by watching these pieces and possibly meeting me. We exchanged e-mails and I hope to be in contact with him to set something up.

After everyone departed, Jim and I reflected on what had occurred. Complete strangers, who don't know me from the next guy, had just come in and watched something that affected them in one way or another. That's pretty amazing! As one of Jim's students summed up so succinctly, "'Pictures worth a thousand words', but words can also be worth an infinite amount of pictures."

During the viewing, I jotted down notes, and have ideas on how to improve what I have. The music I selected to accompany my video was a song by Enya. Jim envisions that we will have all original music pieces on our future productions, thanks to Patrick's talents, the newest hire in Jim's office.

On Saturday, bowling went great, as far as the volunteer situation turned out. We ended up with 10 volunteers, a perfect amount. My mom and I picked up my friend, Lamar, and proceeded to the alley. When we arrived, some Mortar Board alumni showed up and it was nice to see them again. One of Jim's students arrived as well, and that was great to see. She was very excited and enthused to be at the alley. Unfortunately, to be honest, her name escapes my memory, which I feel terribly about!

Nick and Jack, a couple other friends of mine, arrived soon after as well. All of the volunteers appeared happy to be there and helping the league. Lamar helped me for all of my 3 games bowled. It was fun to have his company, as he would be a positive source of encouragement all the way through. He also knew when I made a bad shot and would say something to the effect of, "C'mon B! We can't be having you do that, let's go!" Nick and Jack knew that we'd bowl afterwards, just for fun, and they would attempt to psych me out the whole time, saying things like "Yep, that's how it'll be when we bowl!" That was fun stuff for me.

We completed league play, I ended the day having done average; nothing spectacular, but nothing terribly bad...well, okay, my second game was horrendous. I always seem to have 1 bad game a week; I'm really not sure why this is. In any case, the guys were excited to bowl, I was, too.

I thanked the volunteers for coming, I specifically thanked Jim's student (I know for sure). However, her name STILL escapes my memory! Argggh. During the bowling, I observed her shooting video with a DV mini camera, and also took pictures with a digital camera. I'm assuming she'll use this footage for a project in Jim's class; I don't know for sure though. Hopefully I'll be able to be in contact with her, as it'd be nice to get a copy of the digital picture she took with me. I'm sure Jim will track this student down this week. Again, I apologize to her for forgetting her name!

Bowling with my friends was super! Athletes LOVE competition, regardless of what it is. I'm a highly competitive person, I hate losing or not doing my best. Nick and Jack kept talking trash to me as they bowled. It was close all the way through, between Nick, Jack, and I. Although Lamar wasn't doing as good as he hoped, he still plugged away, trying his best to knock pins down. Later he'd say that he hadn't bowled in years...sure Lamar, excuses, excuses. I'm kidding, of course. I bet with practice he'll kick my butt, so I best watch what I say.

For the first game, I barely held on, with Nick coming oh so close to beating me. A second game was a must! Jack was very consistent throughout. I'm not sure if the pressure got to me, but I really didn't bowl my greatest. I left the door wide open for someone to beat me and sure enough, in the end, an unconverted spare in the 10th frame would be my downfall. Jack stepped up like a champ and did what he had to do. Lamar came close to doing us all in as he nearly bowled a turkey (3 strikes in a row) in the 10th.

All in all, we had a great time enjoying each other's company. Now the big question is, who will win the tiebreaker....I definitely look forward to that! Bring it on, Jack!

After bowling, I got a much needed haircut. It's nice and short now, I like it. Longer hair annoys me; it gets too hot and icky.

On a happier note, I received my PC back from my computer tech friend! Unfortunately, he had to clean out everything and start from scratch, meaning all of the programs I obtained from friends and family, etc. are no longer, and many other files of entertainment are no where to be found. But, I'm just happy my computer works! I have a virus program installed that I've set to scan every night, and I have a firewall operating at all times. It's funny how you don't think about computer security, until you, yourself, experience problems. I've discontinued using any Microsoft products for the Internet, such as Outlook Express and Internet Explorer, opting for the more secure Netscape, Opera, or Mozilla browsers.

In the near future, I'll purchase a Mac workstation as to allow me to be productive at home. My idea is to bring work home on an external hard drive and use my Mac to do work (i.e. video editing) and bring it back to the office when I'm finished. This system will be purchased using my earnings from work, as Social Security policy allows one to do. I'll discuss this more in a future entry.

Randomness of the week (yay! it's back):

Pictures from the Scout Bowl (UH Football scrimmage)


Steven, Lei, Melissa, and Jim meeting at the
computer lab

Until next time, have a great week! And always beware of nasty viruses, of any sort!

Right Place, Right Time

I'll compose this entry backwards, chronicling my most recent activities and then reflecting back on the rest of my week...we'll see how this goes.

I am composing this entry on an iMac. In fact, it is the iMac that I was able to bring home from Dr. Skouge's (Jim) office after the new G5 desktop system got set up. I feel very lucky to have ANY computer at this stage, and although the iMac isn't as powerful as to my PC I've grown to love, I must admit, this ain't bad! It's almost amazing how things worked out...I really was at the right place, at the right time!

Jim ran the idea by me of taking the iMac home, since I had discussed my intent to seriously consider purchasing a Mac workstation so I could do work at home. He felt that the iMac would hold me over for the time being, I'd just need to invest in an external drive. I thought it sounded like a feasible idea.

So. the iMac came home. My room, particularly my desk, has a premium on space as I tend to pile lots of "stuff" on and in it. I'd consider myself a messy, but neat person....my "mess" has an order to it and I'm good about remembering where things are, for the most part. Good ol' Mom might disagree, but so be it.

Currently, my PC is with a computer technician, as the virus I mentioned in my last entry simply would not cease to exist under my watch! Things got a bit out of hand, as we had RoadRunner (RR) calling our house, informing us that we were a "security risk" since others reported receiving SPAM from my IP address. When the Security Department of RR contacts you, odds are you have a serious problem on your hands!

I'm hopeful that I'll receive my much missed PC back sometime this week. On Saturday afternoon, I watched the Hawaii Warrior football team play the Rice Owls in Houston, Texas. The night before, Friday, as is my routine, I called one of my friends on the team to see how things were going. I'm not great at remembering time zone differences, so by the time I called, it was about 11:30pm CST and my friend was preparing for bed. We talked briefly and he reported that practices had gone well the past two days and everyone seemed to be ready to have a good game. Unfortunately, the best laid plans don't always equate to success. I KNOW the players and coaches prepared very hard over the past 2 weeks to prepare for this game. Rice implements a very unique offensive scheme, the triple option. Essentially, it is primarily a run-based offense, where the quarterback has the option to keep the ball and run himself, or pitch the ball off to a running back. The third option comes in the form of a passing play. An extremely difficult offense to defend. Defenders are assigned to specific players and they are to defend their player, and that player alone...this takes lots of patience and discipline. Natural tendency would have defenders pursuing the ball, no matter what, because when you breakdown the game of American football, it entails stopping the opponent from advancing the football into the endzone. When you're asked NOT to pursue the ball, but focus on a player, this alters your whole mentality. The reason for this defensive technique is that should the QB decide to pitch the ball to another teammate and the whole defense has pursued the QB, his teammate will be wide open.

A problematic area today, in terms of Hawaii's defensive play, was the middle. The Rice fullback would run the middle of the line all day, without much interference. Now, the Rice offensive line had much to do with this success, as they would move Hawaii defenders well off the line. Cut blocks or chop bloccks are common practice by Rice offensive lineman; not exactly the most gentlemanly of practices, and although its not illegal if not done blatantly, its considered "dirty" amongst football players. This type of blocking involves diving into the defenders legs, which is very dangerous. Knees and ankles can often be injured as a result of this. Hawaii specifically engaged in drills over the week designed to teach them how to avoid these blocks.

In any case, the Hawaii offense sputtered once again. There were signs of what could be, but nothing was sustained throughout the game. Five sacks were amassed by the Rice defense, an unusually high number allowed by Hawaii's O-Line. Coach Cavanaugh, who is in charge of the O-Line, takes great pride in preparing his men to do the best job in blocking for Timmy, the QB. On this day, there would be uncharacteristic breakdowns in protection. In all fairness, the Rice secondary covered Hawaii's receivers fairly well, so there was often no one open to throw to. Hawaii receivers dropped many, many passes again...this will cause ANY offense to stall.

On the brighter side, these mistakes/weaknesses are all very correctable! I still have the utmost confidence that thee team will ride this ship back on course. It's "one and clear."

Earlier in the day, I had my usual bowling. I had my first decent showing as a whole for this season! I averaged 146 for the three games I bowled. This week a group from an all-girls high school were the volunteers, and I do appreciate all of the volunteers that the league gets, but..I wasn't terrible enthused about this group. Their exuberence level was a tad high for my liking...in other words, they were loud, really LOUD...now, don't get me wrong, I do welcome the occasional cheering, but to go on the entire time?! That's not my cup of tea...and there's appropriate and inappropriate times to cheer. Don't cheer for someone who leaves a 7-10 split, or misses an easy 9-pin...that's poor bowling, no matter how you cut it! I must admit, they're a youthful bunch with lots of energy...that's GOOD. This coming week, Mortar Board is scheduled to help, but finding volunteers will prove difficult as they also have a fundraising function later in the day, so I'll need to help find volunteers from elsewhere (i.e. friends of mine).

Prior to bowling, I went to get my TB test that is required for my employment as a Graduate Assistant. I think in about a week, I'll finally be officially hired! I'm excited about that. This past week, I obtained my hiring forms and there was quite a bit to do...I suppose that's the State for you, endless amounts of paperwork. But I did what I had to do, I'll turn in the last outstanding forms this week. An interesting obsevation while filling out these forms: Does anyone actually own a typewriter anymore?! One form had to by typed out, and luckily I was able to call upon the secretary of the Special Education department for help. Effie was very helpful and typed out this form for me, and made a copy of what I would be submitting. Thanks, Effie!

On Thursday. I had a DCAB (Disability and Communication Access Board) meeting to attend, so I went into work as well; if I was to be in town anyway, I might as well make the most out of it. I'm still feeling my way through things, in terms of being a board member. I was happy to see Sterling at the meeting; I hadn't seen him since our day of adveenture at the football game. My ride to the meeting actually came on time for a change, and I wasn't late to the meeting. However, my ride back to the University was an hour late! Jim had asked me to speak to his class that evening, or actually I proposed giving my presentation on Communication Strategies, as I would be in town, which usually isn't the case. We both agreed that a presentation of that sort was a bit premature, but he asked if I'd come and just "meet" his class and say a few remarks.

As the time ticked towards 4pm, I became more and more anxious. But, luckily I had prepared my remarks the night before so I was ready. However, I'm one who likes to get into a zone of sorts prior to presenting...much like Jim enters a zone prior to teaching, and other professors like Dr. Michael D'Andrea of Educational Counseling & Guidance. It's a way to relax one's self and become focused on the task at hand. Thursday wouldn't provide that opportunity; as soon as I got back to campus I hurried to Jim's class. I wouldn't say that I'm one who enjoys public speaking per se, but the more and more I am placed in positions to do so, I'm feeling more comfortable in such settings.

Speaking to an audience who knows nothing about you is a definite challenge. You literally have only a few seconds to grab their attention. If you fail, the auidence will just shut you out. Prior to my remarks, Jim showed a video piece that I had created by using words, pictures, and music. One piece was Seeing Beyond Images: A Prelude and the other was What I Am. Basically, these pieces were inspired by Norman Koontz's A Credo for Support, in which he masterfully comines text and music to form an extremely powerful message. I hadn't seen my work on a large screen before...I sat there thinking to myself, "Wow, did I really create this?! I must've had one of my better days when I did that!"....I was proud of my work. It's nothing great, but just the fact that I created it provides me with a sense of pride.

After those pieces were shown, Jim cued up a piece that he made, where I talk about who I am and my story of becoming. It's a no frills piece, but gets the message across very effectively. Basically, for about 8 to 10 minutes you get to hear my thoughts...that in itself could be boring, but luckily Jim asked me the "right" questions to elicit somewhat interesting responses!

At the conclusion of that, it was my turn to deliver my remarks., This was make or break time! My message was one of recognizing the power that these people held as future teachers and professionals who would work with persons with disabilities. I also spoke about the importance of taking risks and how much that could affect someone's life path. Lastly, I spoke about the need to recognize people of support in our lives and how valuable of a role such individuals can play. I also threw in attempts at humor, in the forms of jokes, just to keep things interesting...very uncharacteristic of me, but I was demonstrating risk taking to some degree.

In any case, I felt my visit went as well as I could have hoped for. Everyone in the class had a chance to provide me with feedback, of any sort, and it ranged from laughter to tears. Now, when you can deliver something that causes people to experience the spectrum of emotions, your presentation was effective, OR people were in tears from boredom! In this case, I think I stuck a nerve of sorts...to this day, I still am baffled when people cry after hearing my story...it's flattering, I know they are tears of joy (I'd hope!), but in my mind I still haven't done enough to warrant such emotions. I suppose MY standards and expectations of myself are higher than what anyone else could have for me.

After class, I stuck around and provided help/guidance to students as they worked on their iMovie assignment. That was an enjoyable experience, and I've since looked back and thought, "I could get used to being a professor." I've still got lots to do before I can entertain such thoughts. Stay in the moment, Brian, stay in the moment.

On Wednesday, I said goodbye to my sister Lynn, as she headed back to school for her final semester on the continent. I really enjoyed having her company at home...brothers don't usually admit this, but I'll definitely miss having her around!

It would be a day of departure for the UH Warrior football team as well; they had their final practice on campus and then headed off to Houston that night. I wished my friends a good trip. Former special teams coach, McKnight, had come to visit the team over the week. He also left on Wednesday. It was nice to see him again, he always asks if my sisters are treating me well, and if not he vows to take proper action. I enjoy him and I know the players do as well, but he's at a point where he's placed his family first in his life priorities...I admire that.

Jim had a full schedule of meetings to attend once again on this day, so for much of the day, Steven and I were left to our own devices. I duplicated the week's CDs for Jim's class and made copies of a video letter I created for the project sites of Dr. Leake's CLD grant. I also ran around, attempting to get the appropriate individuals to sign my form. That took some effort; I had to find my departmental chairperson, so I went searching for the Counseling & Guidance department head. That's a challenge in itself as the main office is upstairs, inaccessible to persons who use wheelchairs. It's been an issue of contention for many years now, perhaps I'll engage in a discussion in a future blog expressing my thoughts on the issue. Luckily, I was able to find someone downstairs from the department who went to call the chairperson, Dr. Kucera. I hadn't met him before; turned out he appears to be a good person, likeable, supportive. I know I'll need to meet with him in the near future to discuss my plans as they relate to my practicum site placement and my future in the Counseling & Guidance program.

I was a bit overwhelmed at how much paperwork there was in this hiring packet that I retrieved. What has to be done, has to be done no matter what.

On Tuesday, I spent the day at home with my sister, Lynn. She had to pack, so that kept her busy for most of the day. We didn't do anything exciting, we just enjoyed each other's company. I cherished sleeping in late for the last time on a weekday; there will be no such luxuries any more, I'll be up in my chair at 5:30am each day now before my parents head into work. I'll get used to it again...doesn't mean I'll grow to enjoy it, though.

Timesheets were to be done on Monday! There was a moment of alarm when Jim didn't come in by noon...timesheets are usually due by then. Apparently, Jim believed they were due on Wednesday, and to be honest I wasn't sure when they WERE due...all I knew was that it was sometime in the week. I would head to class before seeing Jim on this day. Class went well, although at one point my eyes became really heavy. Focusing was a task in itself! We discussed Sigmund Freud and his theory on human development.

The night before I submitted my first paper for the class via WebCT. It was a personal reflection type of paper, so it wasn't bad to write. In fact, it was oddly calming to write it!

I don't have any random pictures for the week. My digital camera works best with my PC, so until I get that back I'll hold off on posting pictures. I'm hopeful that I'll have my PC up and running again in the next day or two. Until then, beware of nasty viruses! As my computer tech friend said, "don't use any Microsoft products for the Internet!" Quite a statement, huh?!

Even Computers Get Sick

This past week was a mixed-bag. Nice in the sense that it was short, due to Labor Day, but not as great as it should have been in terms of classes.

Of course, being that Monday was a holiday, I would have only one class to attend...or so I thought.

On Wednesday evening, I left work at Dr. Skouge's office, tired but ready to be as best a student I could be. I get to the class location, which is usually buzzing with activity, only to find no one there. A classmate arrives and checks the door to our classroom...it is locked. No sign of activity whatsoever. Was there a sign announcing any cancellation? None! By this time, it was 2 minutes until the start of class.

I observed classmates, who had an earlier class in an adjacent building, leaving campus! I'm thinking, "Did I miss a memo? Was I not paying attention last week?!" After a brief moment of uncertainty, another classmate comes by and says class had been cancelled due to the room being unbearable to sit it; apparently, the air conditioning went out and the room is such that it can become hot really quickly, because of its size and amount of people in the room.

Earlier that afternoon, one of Jim's colleagues who works in the Educational Technology department, came by and inquired about Jim's portable AC unit. I thought, "Hmm, could that be my class?" That was the extent of my ponderance of that inquiry. Surely, someone from the Counseling & Guidance department or my professor would contact me and the rest of the students should class be cancelled. I checked my e-mail up until it was time for me to head to class...no e-mail announcements to be found!

In any event, at this point, I'm sitting outside the building in utter disbelief at what has transpired. Luckily, my other classmates started heading back to the building, realizing that a couple of their classmates had no clue what was going on. These classmates are my partners for a group project that we need to do for class. An impromptu meeting was adjourned to discuss our plans. During this time, Jim was departing campus for the day and saw me outside. He came to inquire as to whether I was okay, I nodded affirmatively and off he went, to enjoy the comforts of home.

During our group meeting, it was decided that we will focus on Cerebral Palsy as our topic of discussion. During the week, I proposed this topic, being that its something that is as close to home as can be, I live with CP day in and day out...every second, of every minute, of every hour, of every day, of every week, of every month, of every year I breathe, eat, sleep, study, and work with this condition. I won't go as far as to claim I'm an expert on this disability, but I'd say I have adequate experience to be helpful to the group in our discussion.

In any case, we met for about 15 minutes. My notetaker then stayed with me, as I waited for my ride home. That was nice of her. We attempted to contact the company that provides my ride home, but those efforts proved fruitless. My mom was SuperMom once again, offering to come pick me up. Judging by the time and weather conditions...I had over an hour left until my scheduled pick-up time and it began raining...I decided to accept my mom's offer. It was nice to arrive home and enjoy dinner before 9pm.

Despite the cancellation of class, I was still exhausted by the time my day ended. My customary routine is to check my e-mail before bed and reply to as many as I can. On this night, I would fall asleep in my chair at my computer desk. By the time I awoke, it was about 1am; my mom had found the couch and had dozed off there, waiting for me to get to bed. I have this odd habit of feeling re-energized after 1am; this is NOT a good habit, as I find myself continuing with e-mail and perusing the news well after 1am, and winding up finally getting to bed around 2am.

Considering I normally need to wake up around 5am, so that I can get into my chair before my parents leave for work, this is not exactly the most healthy of practices. Living on 3 or 4 hours of sleep will and does take its toll on one's body.

Fortunately, my sister, Lynn, is still at home preparing to leave for her final semester as a college undergraduate. So, I was able to sleep in; Lynn would help me into my chair when I awoke. I believe I woke up around 11:30am on Thursday. I felt good and well-rested.

We watched an interesting movie, Pieces of April, later in the day. This was a film about a young woman's attempts to impress her family with a Thanksgiving meal, and the troubles she encounters as everything that could go wrong eventually does. Her family does some reflection on their relationship with their "lost" daughter/sister. Ultimately, this becomes a story about self-discovery and the strong bonds that the concept of family provides, regardless of all the hardships and arguments that might have transpired over one's childhood.

Another major task I dealt with on Thursday was trying to play doctor for my computer. Ironically, after downloading a security update from Microsoft for Windows XP, my computer system became very unstable. Constantly crashing...at one point, I couldn't even get to my start-up screen! This was extremely frustrating and annoying more than anything. I attempted to repair my installed version of XP by loading my program CD. This helped; I was at least able to get to the opening screen. However, the performance was such that I knew my computer had become infected with a virus...essentially I had a sick computer. "Sick" has become a term used amongst the youth of today to refer to something really cool and great, such as "Wow, that car is sick, dude! You got it looking hella good!" In my case, I use "sick" in a traditional sense. My computer had come down with a bug of sorts, like the flu or a cold.

After a while of analyzing the situation at hand, I decided I had to run some anti-virus programs. This was a challenge in itself, as the computer continued to crash so frequently! Finally, I was able to deduce that the Sasser worm had infected my computer. I found an anti-virus program specifically designed to remove the Sasser worm. It worked, the worm was discarded from my computer! I was happy for the time being. I then proceeded to run additional virus checks.

What a shocker this would provide to me. After a full system scan, one anti-virus program had found 7,000 infected files! Lesser computers would have certain;y been dead on arrival, but my computer has taken after its owner in the sense that it perseveres in the face of adversity! As I compose this entry, I am STILL in the midst of trying to nurse my computer back to full health. It is rather amazing how one realizes how dependent s/he is on a computer only after the computer fails in some capacity; this is a good analogy for making sure you take the time to appreciate and thank those around you who help you succeed each and every day.

I literally spent the majority of the weekend trying to fix my ill computer...very annoying to say the least! This explains, in part, why my entry is a bit late.

On Friday, I spent much of the day working independently at Jim's office. He had another round of meetings to attend, so I continued with my project of preparing a series of television shows to be broken into components so that they could be compressed into media that would fit onto a CD. In addition to this, Jim informed me that his student on Maui would be calling the office in the afternoon to test out the iSight camera. I would be the only person available to help this student...the pressure was on me to be as helpful as I could! The student called the office about 15 minutes after the scheduled time that was provided to me, only to inform me that the Internet connection on her end was not working. I calmly said, "No problem, just give me a call when it's up and running again. I'll be here all afternoon."

About 15 minutes later, we had made a successful connection! iSight had allowed someone on Maui to interact, in real-time, with someone on Oahu. I was definitely relieved and happy that it worked! I would have good news to report back to Jim.

On Saturday, I would go to my usual bowling league. Another horrendous performance...after a while, you begin to question yourself in terms of whether it is time to pack it in and move on. I think I'm nearing that crossroad. I bowled two terrible games and one average game. I was NOT a happy camper after bowling. I knew I had to be mentally strong and remain as positive as I could, since it was a family member's birthday and I wanted to be as cheerful as I could.

We would go out to dinner later that evening to celebrate this family member's birthday. It was a nice night out, not without incident, however. While navigating the parking lot at Ward Warehouse, I nearly got hit by a car as I crossed the road! Getting hit by a car does not scare me for some reason, I keep telling myself, "It'll just be one hit and it'll be over!" I like to think that I'm a conscientious pedestrian.

In any case, I look forward to this week. I'll be able to use the nice, new, powerful computer at work! Very exciting stuff!

Midstream Adjusting

Week 2 of my semester was adventurous to say the least. There were unforeseen problems, but just as a former coach for the University of Hawaii, Coach McKnight, used to say, "You have to midstream adjust" if original plans don't go the way you envisioned. In other words, you have to be mentally strong and flexible when hurdles pop up in life and adjust to the situation at hand. Perhaps, it is here that true character is strengthened.

On Monday, I attended class...I do enjoy the professor. But, for some reason, I just couldn't get into the material that was being presented. No matter how hard I tried, I felt disenchanted by it all. I believe the main factor of my mindset on this day was due to the fact I had taken a course from the same professor last semester, and we covered the exact same things that were being presented on this day. The Community Counseling model would be the framework in which our course would be based upon. I think this model is good as it addresses processes to provide the best services in direct and indirect community, and direct client and indirect client interactions and intervention methods. With that said, having already heard the same explanation about 8 months ago, it was difficult for me to be enthusiastic about learning on this day. As a student, I try not to have "off days," and usually I don't; I usually am genuinely happy and eager to be in a classroom (not counting Statistics class, of course!).

After class, I headed back to work and saw Dr. Skouge for the first time this week. He excitedly relayed his newest idea and task for me to work on. I was excited about this new venture as well. We would split all of a series of past television show, that Jim was a part of, into sections. Each section would be able to stand on its own, so conceivably we would have approximately 36 video pieces after concluding this project.

On Tuesday, I had a teleconference for the project headed by Dr. David Leake. This was our third attempt at this, and we were hopeful that the last remaining project sites would join in on this call. Well, only one of the two joined in; apparently there was some mixup on dates on one project site's end. In any case, the conference went well. Ideas were shared and everyone was on the same page. It appears that the Culturally and Linguistically Diverse (CLD) Research Project is finally off the ground and proceeding full steam ahead! During the meeting, Jim brought up the idea of having me compose a letter of invitation to potential project participants...I just love how I get volunteered to do various tasks! Of course, I'm being sarcastic, but I really didn't mind having to write this letter.

Writing a letter to complete strangers was definitely something new to me, but its a good thing to have to go beyond your comfort zone, sometimes. By going being your comfort zone, you are almost forced to grow, and by doing so you're able to learn more about yourself and your abilities. After finishing the letter, I realized that it wasn't painful at all, and in fact it was actually a neat challenge to address people who have no idea who you are. You have just a few seconds to establish your credibility and keep their attention, so the writing needs to be concise but yet captivating. I did as good a job on writing this letter as I could; the true measure will be in the responses that the project receives.

After the teleconference, my sister, Lynn, and I had to hurry down to Blockbuster in Kailua town. The week prior, Lynn borrowed Sling Blade and thought it was due on Wednesday. But in fact, it was due Tuesday; luckily I asked her to check. Sling Blade, by the way, was an excellent movie I thought...one that made you think.

In any case, we made it down to Blockbuster with 15 minutes to spare. Luckily, on this day, the traffic going into the town wasn't too heavy so I made it without much risk to my life. We enjoyed the comforts of the video shop, browsed and settled on The Perfect Score, a film about the pressures placed on high school students to score high on the SAT. After that, we walked over to a little mini-mart of sorts, one that has a variety of shops and places to eat. On the way over, I nearly got crushed by a car! Just prior to crossing a parking lot, I stopped on the side of a parked car; luckily, I wasn't daydreaming, as I normally do, and didn't haphazardly roll into the parking lot. As I stopped and waited for Lynn to catch up, a minivan comes zipping right past me! That actually isn't an isolated incident. Cars in Kailua seem to be constantly going rather fast in parking lots, which really isn't safe.

Anyway, we made it safely to where we wanted to go. Lynn had lunch from Maui Taco and I had something from Ted's Bigger Burgers. Prior to going home, we stopped in Starbucks and Lynn got a drink. That was my first time in the Kailua Starbucks, and its a nice, quiet place, filled with the smell of fresh coffee. I can understand why people go there to study, read, write, etc.

Food and drinks in hand, Lynn and I made the trek back home. Again, traffic wasn't terribly heavy so crossing the infamous bridge wouldn't be too difficult on this day. This is Lynn watching the traffic, waiting to give me the "all clear" signal:

We made it home in about a half-hour. By this time, the sun was glaring down onto the pavement, and we wanted to be out of the heat as soon as possible, so we hurried as much as we could.

After the long excursion, I was ready to eat a good burger! We cut it in half, I take a bite, and I look at it..the burger is RED!! The cow's heartbeat literally could still be heard! I was thinking, "holy cow, after all that...all I want is a good burger!" Lynn is the brains between the two of us, so luckily she proposed cooking it on our stove. I went along with this idea, what did I have to lose really! So, of course, her idea worked brilliantly...my hamburger got cooked, my stomach got filled and all was good in Brian's world again. We watched The Perfect Score together, and both enjoyed it! It was better than I thought it would be, which is always a nice discovery to make.

Marathon Wednesday...I would see Jim very briefly throughout this day. He was busy running from one meeting to the next. I knew what I tasks I needed to work on, and did so. We also needed to duplicate the week's CD for Jim's SpEd 480 class, so I took a trip to the CRC. I finished about 4 videos, each one being an hour. By the time 6pm rolled around, I was admittedly ready to call it a day. However, that would not be the case; I still had a class to attend!

Class on this Wednesday evening was anything but smooth; whatever could go wrong did...we have classmates on 3 outer islands joining us via closed circuit television. Setting this up took some time and effort. One connection would be fine, and another would go off. For about 30 minutes, we sat there, the professor scrambling to make things work, calling tech support, trying anything to get things right. Finally the decision was made to proceed with class, despite one outer island site no where to be found on our monitors; apparently the techies shut the connection off on that island. "You folks deserve a refund tonight," the professor commented. When class starts off as such, you know you're in for a long night! I was alert, eager to learn, and not really tired...but! 8pm rolled around, and boy, my eyes just become so very heavy. I was struggling to focus, struggling to stay awake! I know my eyes must have shut for a few seconds. Luckily, around 8:30 the professor asked if we wanted a break...everyone did, and went outside. I stayed in the classroom and tried to get refocused and re-energized. The classroom's atmosphere was terrible to say the least. Apparently, the class prior to ours was so cold, they kept the door to the outside opened, so by the time we got in the room, the condensation was just a mess! The floor was wet and icky; half the room was cold, half the room was sweating in humidity! The professor vowed to get the situation resolved by our next class; I sure hope it is!

I endured the entire class, by the time it ended at 9:20pm, I was more than ready to head on out of there! We have a group project to do, and as soon as that was announced, everyone secured a group, since everyone in my class are essentially co-workers to each other. Luckily, a classmate from the past two semesters asked if I wanted to be in her group. I was more than agreeable. We need to do a paper and group presentation on a specific disability; I proposed Cerebral Palsy, only because it is the one that is so close to home, I live it every second of every minute of every day! We'll decide on a topic as a group this coming week, though.

I arrived at home around 10:15pm. I had survived about 15 hours of being on campus! Was I tired? Sure. Was I hungry? Most definitely! I can't recall specifically what I had for dinner, but I do know that I ate it all and kept looking for more food to eat! I suppose I do need to re-examine my eating habits for Wednesdays, it would behoove me to grab a bite to eat during the afternoon hours.

On Thursday, I would relax and recover from my long, long day. Lynn and I watched Radio, a movie based on a true story about a man with a mental disability who has served as an inspiration to a high school football team for years on end. I've watched this movie many times, but still find it enjoyable. The great part about it is they include footage at the end of the film of the real individual upon which the movie was based on, and he's still just as supportive of that high school team as he was from day one.

Jim would have yet another full run of meetings to attend on Friday. Prior to his departure, he pitched me an idea of a video letter, as a way for me to introduce myself and show the other project sites where I work. I was excited about the idea, but I'll admit I wasn't exactly enthralled about having others be involved. For instance, Jim proposed having me go to the CRC (the College of Education's library) and asking someone at the front desk to give a little rundown of what the CRC was. I'm still not particularly comfortable with approaching complete strangers...it'll something I'll get used to the more opportunities I place myself in to do so.

Steven, the new student worker at our office, had experimented with the new camera that Jim had gotten recently. On Wednesday afternoon, after finishing up his task of organizing the many wires and cables that ran wild in Jim's cabinets, Steven was given full rein to explore this new camera; a very high-quality one! I enjoy individuals who go about their business quietly and efficiently, getting a job done quickly but correctly...Steven is such a worker. He's a wonderful addition to Jim's office.

When Steven came in on Friday, he began to proceed with his task of organizing another cabinet in the office. I interrupted him and told him of Jim's idea. Steven was very enthusiastic and excited about the idea of going out and shooting footage. He had ideas of his own as well, so we sat there bouncing ideas off of one another. After about 15 minutes of brainstorming, Steven proclaimed, "Let's do this!" and off we went.

We shot all kinds of footage...me crossing the street, going up and down ramps, entering the building...you name it, we probably shot it!

"Aloha, I'm Brian from the University of Hawaii. I'd like to show you where I work. Come along with me." I know, a bit corny, but hey we're still learning here! We don't get paid Hollywood bucks...yet!

Then we went to the CRC...there were two girls at the front desk. My DynaWrite asks, "Would any of you like to briefly explain what the CRC is? We're making a little video." This girl named Courtney agreed to do so, and did a wonderful job in doing so. Was that a terrible experience? Not at all!

After about 45 minutes of having fun going around with this camera, we got back to the office and I began editing the piece. It's still a work in progress, I'll probably finish it this week.

Oh! On Friday, I also met with Dr. Leake and Cherie, one of his GA's. That was a good meeting, it was nice to meet Cherie. We met briefly during a teleconference, but it's always nice to meet people face-to-face. That was another learning experience...Jim had meetings to attend, so he left me to my own resources for this meeting. I think I handled it fairly well, I made it move along at a good pace and covered all that needed to be covered. The plan is Cherie and I will meet every other Friday to touch bases, and see if we can be of support to one another.

Earlier in the week, I checked in with my friend Doug, to see if he would be available to attend the first UH Warrior football game of the season, since I had pitched the idea to him earlier in the summer. Unfortunately, he was bitten by a centipede and had missed some days at work so he had tasks to work on this weekend and wouldn't be able to attend the game. So, I did some pondering and thought....Sterling!!

Along with Sterling comes Jim, of course. What a duo they are...if one needs to pass 3+ hours prior to a game, you can't go wrong with these individuals.

"We need to be there at 2:30, but the game starts at 6pm," I reported to both of them.

"Now, what the heck are we to do from 2:30 to 6?!" Jim retorts, in a flabbergasted state.

"Eat, drink, and enjoy each other's company. Doesn't that sound fun?!" I reply.

"Okay, we're on!" So, the plans were a go! I was looking forward to Saturday from about Thursday on.

I arrived on campus at 1:45, the time Jim and Sterling were to pick me up. Things were off to a good start! Sterling and I managed to fit our chairs into the van, and Jim was the driver...we set off to pick up our friend, Brad. Brad had to run up to his apartment, to give his wife, Rosie, a camera she had requested from Jim. It was now about 2:15, and I'm thinking, "there's no way we're making it to the stadium by 2:30." Just go with the flow, Brian. Just go with it.

As we're rolling along, I'm noticing the temperature gauge on the dashboard starting to rise, higher and higher. I kept silent, hoping that it'd go down.

Jim notices this after a while and says, "Sterl, our temperature is getting up there, I think we might be overheating! Should we get on the freeway or not? It's your call, buddy!"

"Let's go for it. It should cool down as we go along the highway," Sterling replies.

Additional lights, warnings, and dings come on as we're rolling along. We were 1 intersection away from entering Aloha Stadium. Silence..."Beep, beep!" "Beep!" Cars began honking at us as we sat there stuck, stalled...The little minivan that could finally gave out. Luckily, a nice lady was nearby and asked if we needed help, and then proceeded to call the policemen who were about 25 yards away. The policemen would come to our aid, Brad jumped out to help them push the van into a gate, that was closed but became opened for us to enter, while Jim steered.

Jim was not about to let this incident hamper our afternoon of fun! He quickly unloaded Sterling and I from the van, and began to pass out drinks and pizza that we brought. We lucked out actually and were situated in a nice, shady area. We sat there eating and enjoying ourselves as best we could for about and hour. Jim attempted to start the van again after that, to no avail. Another hour passed, and the policeman informed us that busses would soon enter the lot so we should make arrangements to have the van moved. Sterling called AAA, and about 20 minutes later, the tow truck came. The tow truck looked oddly small, as you can see here:


The nice lady who helped us flag down the police officers, turned out to be in charge of the shuttle services for Roberts Hawaii, the company who provides shuttles on game days to and from the stadium. She said she would arrange to have an accessible shuttle for Sterling and gang after the game.

I made a decision not to break tradition, and stay after the game to see the players as they departed the stadium. I always see them after a game, win or lose. This is a small way in which I can show my support to them. Sometimes they're happy, sometimes they're quiet and wanting to leave as soon as possible. The original plan called for Sterling, Jim, and Brad to leave immediately after the game.

This proved to be a beneficial decision, as my parents stayed in town after the wedding they attended, and waited to pick me up, as opposed to going home. After the game, I informed my mom that we ended up without a car and I asked her to call Jim; I wanted confirmation that they all had made it onto the shuttle safely...they did. Jim asked if Brad and he could have a ride from Sterling's place to retrieve Jim's car...we were more than willing to do that.

The game itself was filled with highs and lows. At the end of the first overtime, Hawaii came up short. Losing any game doesn't feel good...losing the season opener leaves a rather bitter taste, after all of the excitement and anticipation leading up to the season. Little mistakes eventually caught up to the team in the end...missed tackles, dropping passes that are normally caught, etc...ALL of these aspects are correctable. Another positive is that the team fought hard till the very end, they busted their butts. I know they'll work hard to correct weaknesses and come back stronger next game out.

After this game, its safe to say the mood of the team was very somber and subdued. My friend, Lamar, felt like he let the team down. No words were needed, I could see it in his eyes that he was truly disappointed, and he could see that I was still supportive of him, regardless. We said our goodbyes for the night.

On Sunday, we would chat and I told him that he had to put this game behind him and look towards the future, keeping his head up and staying positive. Tasting defeat, make successes even sweeter. I KNOW he will grow from this set back and will bounce and have a wonderful season!

I attended a Mortar Board (MB) meeting on Sunday, as I'm a student advisor. I've been associated with MB for the past 4 years, so I try to pass on tidbits of helpful advice when needed. This year's membership seems to be on top of things so its been fun working with them.

This week is a short week, since Monday is Labor Day. The next UH football game will be September 18th, in Houston, Texas, when the Warrior play the Rice Owls.

Randomness for the week:

Brad, Sterling, & Jim talk to the tow truck
operator at Aloha Stadium.


Lynn makes the long journey home
from Kailua town.


Clouds.

I enjoy taking photographs of the sky and clouds. They provide an odd sense of calm and serenity to me. Clouds make beautiful patterns in the sky and the blue color of the sky is something I love!