Brian's Ramblings

My thoughts in text, photo, and video form

Saturday, July 31, 2004

"Surround Yourself with People Smarter than You"

Another very busy, productive, and fun week has passed. The summer is quickly coming to a close...funny how time DOES fly right by when you're having fun! In about a month, it'll be back to the grind of graduate school...yippee? We shall see. I know I'll have wonderful professors, as I took courses from them last semester.

One thing does concern me, however. Our department chair, who also actively taught classes (and was my advisor, too!) left this position last month to pursue a new journey on the mainland. I do understand that people need to do what's right for THEM, I respect that. In lieu of this, a sort of quandary has risen within the department. We literally have just ONE faculty member who is experienced in Vocational Rehabilitation counseling; all others are either focused on school or community-based counseling. A bit of an unbalanced situation exists. Thus, this one professor appears to be set to cover for the departed faculty member. A very daunting task indeed! In order to accomplish this, scheduling issues have become reality! How can one person teach X number of classes? By extending day, by this I mean staying later than usual to accomplish teaching X number of classes. What does this mean to me? I've happen to lucked out and have a class that would have been taught by the departed individual (I say this with as much sarcasm as I can muster up!). So, I'm excited that someone else has taken over the responsibilities of teaching the course, but! Guess what time it'll be? From a manageable time of 4:30 pm to 7:00 pm, the course will now be held at the ungodly time of 7:05 to 9:35 pm...NIGHT time, people's bed time, time to enjoy re-runs of Friends time, time to unwind from a long day, I could go on and on, but you get the picture! And here I thought 4:30 to 7 pm classes were pushing my limits, this takes it to a whole new level. But, like everything else I've had to experience thus far in life, I'll learn to deal with it and make the most out of it (with exception to Trigonometry, of course....failing to pass that twice...boy, that DOES say something about my mathematical competencies!)!

On that lovely math note, a funny thing happened this week. In a conversation with my boss, Dr. Skouge (Jim), he asked me how many pages were in the book that I had compiled for him. I proudly answered 51, as I had meticulously added up all of the pages in the separate books that were to make up this one book. No sooner after ending that conversation, I realized that I left out an entire book from the tally! So, later in the afternoon, he confirms the pages, "There's about 50 pages total, correct?" "No, I made a mistake in counting and there are really about a hundred pages," I replied. "How could the number change so much?!!" "Math isn't a strong point of mine!" And I keep establishing that point very well, even as I grow!

"Observation w/ a thought from the peanut gallery" of the week:
Monday, "Bob" (real name edited to protect the integrity of this person, and to protect myself!) comes in, and mind you I hadn't seen him in at least a week, and reports "I got mixed up and forgot my wife's birthday is THIS week instead of next..." Now, please know I have much respect for "Bob," but....usually a wife's birthday would become planted in the forefront of one's brain, upon getting married! Maybe I'm wrong...I still have much, much to learn and discover as my life evolves.

I completed even more transferring of video from external hard drives and onto mini DV tape. I think I've filled about 20 thus far, which equates to roughly 20 hours of footage, provided that my math skills aren't totally askew! Jim produced a bunch of media for a distance learning course he's in the midst of teaching now, and our aim is to move all of this edited video off of these drives so we can use the space again for other projects. Out of the 50+ pieces, I think there's only a handful left to be completed. And it's always a good thing to know that you and your boss are on the same page....case and point, on Monday Jim and I exchanged pleasantries and proceeded to engage in discussion about what had transpired the week prior (while he was away) and what would be going on this week, along with other thoughts that we wanted to share. So, Jim declares, "I want to have a system where I can easily find shows...something that will allow me to say 'hey, where's the episode featuring Sterling?" and you'd be able to pull it up easily." To that, I happily handed him a detailed log containing the tape number and everything on the tapes, some including specific time coding information. So, slowly but surely I'm beginning to be smarter in how I do things. I like to have things in an orderly fashion, so maintaining this log seemed like the right thing to do.

On Monday, I learned that I'd be on my own for the better part of the week; I'm getting more and more comfortable with this...of course, I'd much prefer company and a guiding presence around me, but I enjoy being as independent as I can be. This summer, I've broadened my horizons and views as to what I can accomplish on my own; I KNOW this will have a positive impact on my life from here on out.

Jim alerted me that he probably would be heading back to the Big Island (Hawaii) on Friday, to visit the children of Miloli'i, as their summer fun program would be concluding. I showed him the work I had done with the photographs, meticulously converting each one to black and white and adjusting the brightness/contrast so that each one looked as best they could. I was happy to demonstrate that, yes, I could finish tasks (no matter how large, or small) on a timely basis. In any case, he was pleased with the work I had completed and expressed his appreciation for my taking the time to do all this...then he proceeds to say the words, "Hey, you know, I have an idea..." When those words are uttered, that usually means someone has come up with yet another task for you to tackle. I was all ears. He, hesitantly (I think), asked if I'd consider converting even more pictures to black and white! The 3 magic words that got me completely on board were not "do it now!", but rather I want to bring books "for the kids." Here is an excerpt from an e-mail correspondence I had with him this week, which will provide a better insight as to my thoughts as they relate to this:

"I had a very productive day at home. I attacked those pictures like there was no tomorrow! In a weird sense, I feel a sort of connection with these children, even though they have no idea I exist, and I know nothing more of them than faces in pictures and video. Anyway, I was motivated to do FOR them, so I'm very happy to share that I finished the entire album of "Kids on Cams" in black and white!!! I even put the book together and converted it to PDF file."

So, when it was all said and done, by Thursday afternoon, a book of 101 pages was being printed up; each child would receive one as a gift from Jim. Hopefully they'll enjoy it and have it to share with their families as to what they did during the summer of 2004.

On that note, I must mention the secretary of the Special Education department, Effie. Effie was extremely helpful all week long, no matter what my request she was more than willing to help out...from making sure time sheets were in on time, to providing me with paper for our printers, and finally actually printing up the book for Jim, she did a lot. We thank you for your help!

One day, one of Jim's colleagues, Dr. Rhonda Black came in to say hello and requested the address for my blogging site. I was happy that 1) She knew of it; and 2) She actually wanted to take time to check it out! So, I happily jotted down the address and provided it to her.

I do hope that people are reading or will be reading my entries in this blog. In another conversation, Jim had mentioned something to the effect that "it's nice to know there's someone on the other end enjoying what one writes." This is so very true. For one, I do take the time to thoughtfully construct what I write for the week, and I do try and make it as interesting as possible! I'm one who appreciates the fact that time is so precious, and why waste time reading something that is boring or has no value/meaning to you?! So, I make a conscious effort to compose these entries in a way that is entertaining, interesting, but yet conveys some sort of message. Everyone will interpret the message in their own way, but my hope is that you DO end reading this with some thought or idea that you might not have had prior or at the very least, a smile comes across your face.

And, I'm still awaiting my first batch of comments!!! I'm one who enjoys feedback. And, I'm more than willing to correspond with any of you out there reading this...if you e-mail me, I WILL respond.

Before I end for the week, I must address my title of this entry! On Thursday afternoon, while Jim was in a mode of controlled chaos, I tried being as helpful as I could, and to that he uttered the idea that his dad instilled in him, which was to "surround yourself with people smarter than you." Idea being, too often people are too ego-driven to admit that yes, in fact they don't know everything nor can they do everything...I can see how this holds true, and it does make a whole lot of sense. I'm don't posses natural smarts, I certainly won't win any awards on the merit of my mental abilities...I KNOW that. I need to put in significant time and energy to produce intelligent work. When I look at friends I have, good friends and acquaintances alike, I see that, yes indeed, I have surrounded myself with people who are way, way smarter than me (in a natural sense) and those who will impact society at a much deeper level than I could ever imagine. Indulge me, if you will, as I briefly attempt to illustrate this: Taron, a law student at one of the most prestigious Law Schools in the country, Georgetown; Aaron, a medical student at one of the most prestigious Medical Schools in the country, Mayo Clinic; Rachel, an intern/researcher at a hospital in Boston, Leilani; a double masters student in Human Services and communications, who does more things in 24 hours than I could do in a week; Adam, a future medical school student - ALL of these individuals are awesome and the common bond we share is that we were all once members in the Hui Po'okela Chapter of Mortar Board at the University of Hawaii at Manoa (an honor society at the University, promoting the ideals of leadersship, service, and scholarship). Of course, I didn't name every single member whom I met and served with, but the picture is clear...they are ALL smarter than I'll ever dream of being. My sisters...oh they'll sure love reading this, I'll write it anyway...they're doing extraordinary in their academic studies at their colleges, one in Oregon and the other in Spokane, Washington...Lynn carries an absurdly high GPA and looks to complete her undergraduate work this December, which means she'll have finished in 3 1/2 years!!!! Lori's constantly making the Dean's List and doing excellent work at school. My friends from back in the day....Dan's doing great things in New York at a major sports enterprise, constantly doing great things for them (and on the brink of taking his personal life to the next level, congrats on that, buddy!!); Brent's a cop in Chicago, he completed his graduate studies in a year; and Ed, who is a graphic designer for the USPS in Oklahoma. Other friends or people who have supported me are just as smart as the next person, too numerous to list here (VERY briefly...Doug, who has so many life experiences and fisherman stories that he so generously shares with me; Ann, the guru of disability services; Dr. James Little, a great advocate for persons with disabilities; David, who knows more about restaurant management than I'll ever know; Aletha, someone with a rich knowledge of Autism and the passion to do all she can to provide the best services to students with autism; Jim, the boss (what more could be said!); Sterling, who knows more about serving persons with disabilities so they may access computers more effectively, etc etc. Oh! and of course my parents...what more could I say?! What happened to the notion of my inheriting their genes?!

In any case, the question becomes, what does all this mean?? Simply put, I'm, perhaps, THE luckiest individual to have established a connection of sorts with ALL of these people, and many more! So, when it's all said and done, the only way I can view myself as "smart" was in the way I associated myself with others. You never fully understand how good you have it until you take the time to actually "smell the roses." At this stage of my life, the roses are smelling quite nice, and they're on the verge of blooming, if only I'm willing to keep watering them and caring for the ground in which they reside. One common thread amongst all of the individuals mentioned above: Hard work. I know that in order for me to do the little good I'm hoping to achieve, I'll need to work just as hard as the next person, if not harder. Am I willing? Yes!

Random photograph of the week:

Brian wearing a LiveSTRONG rubberband in
support of Lance Armstrong's fight against cancer.

Welcome home, Lori! And yet, to think 21+ years ago, when my dad said, "You have twin sisters!" I literally said something to the effect of, "Nooo, it can't be! I want brothers!!!" The feeling still lingers in the deep, deep realms of my brain....only kidding, really I am! See a picture below of the welcoming:

See how happy I really look?!

Earlier in the day (Saturday) I got a haircut:

"Anything will be an improvement!"

Sunday, July 25, 2004

Week 1 of My 28th Year of Life

Being one's own boss....that's a very empowering feeling and one that carries inherent responsibilities. I had my second go at this experience, as my boss, Dr. Skouge, took a trip home to celebrate his mother's birthday. I knew what I had to get done and I had my mind set on getting everything done. When I set my mind on a goal, I develop a form of tunnel vision to some degree. This is both good and bad. I'll hopefully get to expound on this characteristic as my blogging continues.

My tasks for the week were clear cut: 1) Move video footage off of our external drives and onto mini DV tapes; 2) Convert and edit pictures taken during a Miloli'i (a small village on the Big Island of Hawaii) summer fun camp.

Although I had just celebrated my birthday on Sunday and could have easily rested at home on Monday, I decided to go into work. Here's a picture of the cake I had (guava chiffon, an unusual request on my part!):

Believe it or not, I did eat!

For me, I'm better able to find my sense of purpose by being out and actively doing, rather than doing nothing at home. Not to say I don't enjoy the occasional periods of "vegging out," otherwise known as doing nothing more than basking in the comforts of one's surroundings. I find that I get restless if I don't have anything to occupy my mind and time with; in a sense, I NEED mental stimulation. Thus, this summer has been such a treat! I've been busy, kept busy, for much of my days.

Anyway, Monday morning I get into the office and find 8 blank tapes...I wasn't exactly sure how much of them I'd actually fill. I quickly figured out that each tape holds 63 minutes of footage, nothing more! To start, it helps to actually know how to do what you're supposed to do....I know I was told, shown, and did transfer to mini DV from iMovie before, but it hasn't become a regular task so I was a bit unsure at first. But I quickly remembered; it's funny how the mind can become cued by littlest things. My cue was the word "Export;" I essentially broke my task down into fundamentals...what was I trying to do? Move or transfer something out of one place and into another, thus exporting or sharing! I found the option called 'Share' on the menu bar of iMovie. It worked, I had found success...a great feeling, indeed! I would soon come to the realization that this particular task would involve considerable "down time," in the sense that you have to wait for the footage to transfer and it processes in real-time. If you are moving a 45-minute piece, it will take 45-minutes to do so.

Multi-tasking - One of society's most valued concepts today....it's about making the most out of one's time and energy, not just focusing on ONE task at a time, but rather looking to work on a multitude of tasks at once. Some people excel at this and are unbelievably efficient, others aren't. That's just how it is. I'm one who is comfortable with some multi-tasking, but I am not one who lives to do a 100 tasks at once....it becomes hard for me to put forth my best effort in such circumstances, I'm more of a "looking at maybe one or two (possibly 3) tasks at any given time and giving 100% to those tasks" type of person. I find that if I extend myself beyond that, the quality of my efforts become lessened...I pride myself on quality work. In any case, I wanted to maximize my work efficiency, so I worked on editing photos on a laptop. While editing, I noticed that my ability to be aware of my surroundings was decreased by the fact that my back would be facing the door, because of the way I had set up my laptop "workstation." Creativity often stems from one's desire to solve minor problems or improve upon situations. I looked around the room, saw our lovely iSight cameras, and a light bulb went on in my head...I could use these cameras to serve as a surveillance or look-out tool!

So, there I was, setting up these cameras, one on a computer towards the inside of the room, and one on another laptop that was nearby to me (one that was in my line of sight, even while working on editing), really having no clear plan of what the heck I was doing. I suppose when you have no plan in mind, you can't really fail and the fun of creative solutions is found in the process itself. I positioned both cameras towards the door and opened up iChat, and made the computers, upon which these cameras were mounted, "talk" to each other. Essentially this gave me a full-screen video of the door, and a smaller image of the doorway/hallway. I sat there and watched....wow, this is cool!...I can keep an eye on the door with my back towards it. This was literally like having eyes on the back of your head.

So, I proceeded to edit photos, all the while keeping an eye on the door. When the video finished transferring, I would change gears and cue up another video piece to move. I had a nifty system in place.

Later in the afternoon, a co-worker of mine, Rosie came in and that was a welcomed presence. She worked on making duplicate copies of a DVD for a show we produced, and that process also involves significant time. So, during one of our shared times of waiting, I asked Rosie if there was anything I could do to help her out the next time I came in. She mentioned making more copies of our DVD's...I was more than willing to do so.

By the time my work day ended on Monday, I filled 5 of the 6 tapes that I was left with. Progress was definitely being made, and at a faster rate than I had expected! Prior to leaving for the day, Jim called to check-in on our activities, and he mentioned the fact that he would be checking e-mail on a regular basis while away...in fact, he mentioned this twice. Usually, when people mention something more than once, it's a hint that they want some sort of action taken. So, I came home that night, and e-mailed Jim a sort of daily task update, just so he could be aware of what was going on. I found this sort of writing to be almost relaxing and calming to some degree, as it was much like the writing I'm doing now....no organized form, just writing whatever comes to mind at a given time, and not worrying about grammar (well, okay, maybe giving that just a little thought!).

On Tuesday, I stayed home, let my body rest and recover from a full day of being out and active. My body is in constant motion, due to the involuntary movements brought on by my Cerebral Palsy. So, a full day of being out, does take a toll as I feel a bit more fatigued than when I am just relaxing at home and don't need to concentrate my energies on making precise movements in order to perform tasks. Not to say that when I am home, my body acts differently...I guess it's more a matter of not having to focus on being at my peak performance level, and just letting my body do and work at it's leisure.

I worked on editing photos from home for a few hours, making more of a dent in the amount of photos that needed to be completed.

On Wednesday, I went into the office...ready for another day of doing as much as I could. I set up my little surveillance system, started up my transferring of footage to tape, began duplicating a DVD, and started more photo editing. Later that morning, a student who was in a class taught by Jim's colleague, Cecily, came in to say hello.

Having "strangers" come in to interact with you is really interesting! Soon, you shed the stranger label and begin to view them as friendly beings! This occurred twice during the week, and both times the visits resulted in conversations. These individuals weren't afraid or hesitant to ASK questions of me, as they related to goals and life perspectives. I love it when people ask me questions...too often, society is quick to use their own perceptions and judgements of others and hold those beliefs as truths, instead of taking the time to find out what's really going on...this is a natural response, living in such a fast-paced society. There simply isn't enough time to interact and get down to the truth of things and people. I respect and understand this. However, it IS very refreshing and great to know that there are people who will make the time, and take the time, to get to know how someone really is. Being in an office which people pass day in and day out, brings some familiarity to people, which probably leads to a heightened comfort level or curiosity to reach out and explore/investigate.

I'll be brief in my detailing of my workdays from here on out (at least for this entry!), with the thought that I don't want to bore people with minute details, that probably only I, myself, find interesting!

On Tuesday afternoon, one of my friends, who happens to have played for the UH football team, called me to invite me to join a bunch of them at Ryan's Grill at Ward Centre. Of course, in order to get there, I had to rely on "Mom's Taxi," so I had to clear it with her before I committed to attending. However, almost always, my mom, being so giving, has said yes to driving me where I need/want to go. It IS a dream of mine to be able to drive; I use "dream" loosely here, being that until I know for sure it is impossible for me to achieve, it can also be viewed as a goal. In any case, I joined my friends at dinner. We had a great time, enjoying each other's company. They celebrated my birthday with me, and treated me to a wonderful meal. We are all on different paths in life....one is preparing for his first season as a professional athlete, one is managing a restaurant here in Hawaii, one is preparing for a career as a policeman, one is preparing for the upcoming season at UH, and one gearing up for his second year in his respective graduate program. With respect to allowing these "public" figures to enjoy a night out like any other person, I did not take pictures to capture the moment; I feel that everyone deserves privacy and the opportunity to have a meal without having the attention of fans. It's really neat to get to know people who we often view on television as "stars" away from that arena, and as everyday human beings...friends! On that note, I am definitely excited about the fast-approaching UH football season. It all starts up on August 9th, with fall camp; this basically entails 2 practices a day, usually 2-hours each. As players often say, THIS is where success begins! I'll share more thoughts on UH football in the coming weeks. But it's safe to say that I look forward to this time of year and experience sheer excitement over the course of a season.

On Wednesday afternoon, Rosie tracked down more mini DV tapes for me to use. I believe there were 6 more tapes made available. On Thursday, I knew that would be the last day I'd go in for the week, so I was determined to get as much done as I could. I put in a full day of work and then some! I managed to fill 13 tapes in all, with the 14th half filled and waiting for my return on Monday.

Mistakes and errors....We ALL experience this aspect of life. I hate making mistakes. However, I feel that mistakes ARE okay to commit, as long as one learns from their errors and makes a conscious effort not to make the same mistake twice! I experienced a lapse in judgment last week, and for a while it ate at me on the inside. But, I received words of reassurance and comfort from Rosie and Jim...I thank them for that. I also believe that when one makes a mistake, one needs to have strong integrity and take full responsibility for their actions. I immediately held myself accountable for my actions and intend for this to be the ONLY time I make the mistake I did. I also will accept whatever consequences that come as a result of my actions. "I have failed...That is why I succeed." This is one of my favorite quotes, made by Michael Jordan, that I use in my daily approach to life.

Lastly, a few random thoughts....Congratulations to Lance Armstrong for winning the Tour de France! What an amazing individual he is. I've been showing my support for him and the cause he stands for (finding a cure for cancer) by wearing a yellow rubberband on my wrist. You can learn more about it at http://wearyeallow.org Definitely a cause worth supporting!

It was great chatting with my friend, Ed, the other day. Ed's been one of my best friends for the past 14+ years. We first met during our freshman year at Kailua High School. Ed now lives in Okalahoma, with his wife, Brandi. They just got a cute white dog, named Krypto! Very cool....

Sunday, July 18, 2004

My Week Leading Up to Becoming a Year Older (and wiser, perhaps?)

There's something very rewarding and fulfilling when you discover things on your own....getting such things to actually work is an added bonus! Sharing such discoveries with others is where you experience the most joy. What fun is it to learn things and have them bottled up in your mind and NOT share things with others?! In life, communicating ( in ANY way) with others is such an important aspect of living! It is how we find support, encouragement, correction, joy, sadness...pretty much the gamut of human emotion and feelings.

Perhaps, the best communicators (and people to communicate with) are teachers/professors. On Monday, when I went into work for Dr. Skouge, I was genuinely eager to show him what I had done over the weekend, after presenting at TFL. I am one who prefers to have a baseline to work from, assuming I have a project/assignment to do, ahead of time, as opposed to waiting until the last minute. Baseline, or models, allow us (or at least me) to, dare I say, procrastinate and maybe (just maybe) wait until the last minute to do things. Essentially if we have a baseline to follow, completing what we need to do should become "mindless" work. Now, mindless can imply not giving thought to something - that is NOT what I mean in this instance. My project entails communicating my life story as it evolves, so obviously I need and WANT to put in significant thought into what I convey. My aim, or should I say our (Dr. Skouge, Dr. Leake, and I) aim, is to present my story in a somewhat interesting, but more importantly accessible mode. Thus, my writing here at a blogging site.

Getting back to my point, I had discovered blogging a while back, dabbled in it a little and that was that - never feeling inspired or had the urge to maintain an online journal for the world (or whoever was interested) to see. But agreeing to participate in a project that Dr. David Leake is coordinating demands that one be willing to share as much as possible, and in ways that are creative, so that the goals of the project are met. I'll save the discussion of the goals of Dr. Leake's project for a later entry. So, blogging...I discovered that I could effectively and efficiently communicate my thoughts on my own and present them in such a way that was easy to follow and access! I also discovered how to enhance my sharing, by including text, audio, and even video!

I shared my work with Dr. Skouge and he, too, was genuinely excited about what I had discovered and worked on! This type of reaction and feedback can only serve to motivate someone to keep working just as hard. It also helps to have an experienced storyteller (or conduit for storytelling) like Jim, as a mentor, as he can provide me with ideas to enhance the ideas I might have come up with. "Audio is a powerful mode of media" - those words lingered in my mind for a while, and I was determined to find a way to be able to figure out how to incorporate audio into my blogging, thus my entry with my conclusion from my presentation Communication Strategies for Persons with Speech Impairments. As I'm typing, my mind is just running through the endless possibilities that lay ahead of me!

Jim and I had a wonderful week working together. I was able to sit in on a very important meeting that could potentially benefit a beautiful community on the Big Island (Hawaii). Sitting in on such meetings are great experiences as I'm able to learn how to act in the most professional way, respecting what the other participants are saying, all the while standing up for what YOU believe in. Sometimes you need to be agreeable, but at other times you need to stand up for what you believe in, throw it out into the open, and not be afraid of how it will be received. Ah, sounds like advice I could use in my own personal dealings with "professionals!"

Work does NOT need to be all serious and boring. This was demonstrated to the nth degree this week, right in Jim's office. Suffice it to say, Jim and I had a blast! We shared so many laughs throughout the week, and that was great! We fiddled around with technology that Jim has discovered (with the help of computer-tech genius, Silas), involving cameras and AOL Instant Messenger. The office now has the ability to hold video conferences with full-screen video that looks just like broadcast TV-quality! Apple makes amazing products! Anyway, we were "testing" this system, and the way Jim had set it up, he'd talk and his voice would travel into the deep spaces of the Internet and output on a laptop that couldn't be more than 3 feet away. This created a fascinating echo effect, since live sound travels faster than sound going through the 'net. I can't really explain it well, since the concept is way beyond that what my feeble mind can process...Bottomline, it is COOL!

On Thursday, July 15, I attended my first meeting as an appointed board member for the Disability and Communication Access Board (DCAB). I was appointed to this position by our Governor, Linda Lingle. It's an honor and privilege I take very seriously. I was nervous going into Thursday since it would be a whole new ballgame to me. I had no expectations or pre-conceived notions of what this board meeting will entail. Jim, in his infinite wisdom, comments to me literally minutes before I am to leave for this meeting, "Just know that sometimes these types of board meetings can be very boring...but don't be afraid to share your thoughts and knowledge with them!" The existing board members were very warm in welcoming me to their group. Everyone on the board brings with them years of experience and wisdom, so I view this as yet another learning opportunity that will only prove to be beneficial to my growth, personally AND professionally.

Kristine, a staff member for DCAB, who's been extremely supportive and instrumental in allowing me to become more active in the disability movement community, especially as it relates to representing persons with speech impairments, provided me with encouraging words after I had relayed some of my initial thoughts after attending the my first Board meeting.

I won't reveal everything that went on during this meeting but I'll relay some of the thoughts that ran through MY mind. First, "How the heck did I get myself here!?!?!"
- everyone is established professionally and here comes in this "kid" who is still in school! Second, "Don't say anything that will make me look foolish!" - save that for future meetings, once I have established some credibility, that way the bar of forgiveness won't be set so high! Third, "Don't go against ANY votes" - I did my homework and read through the background information on the issues that were to be voted upon and I really agreed with everything that was proposed, thus this was NOT a big deal.

My Thursday was a long, long day. It began as usual around 5:30 a.m., and I didn't get home until about 8:30 p.m. But even then, I felt compelled to stay up even more - I'm a night owl. I do my better thinking at night. As soon as I got home, I checked my e-mail (a natural reaction for ALL people, right?!) and found out that my friend Aletha had purchased tickets for us to see a comedy show on Friday. Ralphie May, a nationally-known comic, made famous from appearing on NBC's Last Comic Standing and the late night show, Jimmy Kimmel Live, was the headliner. Aletha saw an advertisement at the Blaisdell the week before, while attending TFL, and had asked if I'd be interested in checking that out. I've never attended, nor contemplated attending, any comedy shows, but I agreed to check it out.

I know I mentioned Aletha in a prior entry, but I'll elaborate a bit more. Aletha has opened up my eyes to the"fun" aspect of life. Enjoying my first beverage known as a 'screwdriver,' enjoying a tiny bit of crab (and living to write about it!), appreciating the ambiance on the Roof of Dave & Buster's, etc.
- These are all experiences that have resulted in the friendship I've developed, and am developing, with Aletha. She's definitely going to make for a wonderful Dr. Aletha, when she finds that "want-to" sense in finishing up her doctorates degree. It's not a matter of IF, but a matter of WHEN...time is a mute point...as I mentioned to her, sometimes we need to become re-energized, and as soon as we do we can plow our way through just about anything we desire!

Paul Ogata, a local comedian here in Hawaii, opened for Ralphie May and he was funny as heck! What is up with girls dressing in shorter and shorter clothes these days anyway?! A thought to ponder. Aletha made an interesting observation that I'm now realizing is very true - we remember that a certain person is funny, but remembering exactly what they said that made us laugh so hard is almost impossible to do! With that said, and in respect to honoring the work of the comics, I won't even attempt to relay any jokes in full!

Ralphie May is a HUGE guy. But he is funny as funny can be! In my mind, he put on a solid show, going about a full 2-hours non-stop. It was much more than the PG-13 activities I had intended for Aletha to plan. But, what the heck, I will be a year older tomorrow - so why not get exposed to some R-rated material?! Ha ha....I don't think I've heard so much vulgarities uttered since watching South Park: The Motion Picture! The funniest material, at least in my mind, and I hope I don't come off as an insensitive person, was his set about ______. (Subject left blank to protect my integrity and maintain whatever respect I've earned thus far in life!) What he said was so true though, _______ truly are the happiest people on this Earth and people spend big bucks trying to become _______ (i.e. consuming alcohol and mind-altering substances). See picture below:



Aletha, Ralphie May, & Brian

As I reflect on my first 28 years of life, I definitely am proud of what I have accomplished. However, I am more excited and anxious of all of the opportunities that lay ahead of me. Numerous doors of opportunities have been opened, it is MY duty to take it upon myself and take the bull by the horn so to speak and walk through these doors. Or in my case, roll/wheel through them without hesitation! I believe that I haven't made my contribution to society yet, but these 28 years have placed me in a great position to reach my goal. Was Rome built in a day? Of course not! So, whether it takes me X amount of years, or Y amount of years, as long as I have the vision of a goal in the forefront of my mind and do everything in my control to reach that goal, I can't afford to become pre-occupied with the notion of time. Things WILL happen. I WILL make a difference in this world. My goal, which is to help at least one person realize his or her hopes and dreams, coincides with my philosophy of life. If I am able to help someone, I would hope in turn that person will feel motivated to help someone else, and so on and so forth. Ultimately, we can create and maintain this endless continua of help that will thrive and grow long after I am gone. I WILL achieve my goal.

I'd be remiss if I didn't acknowledge and thank ALL the wonderful people (family, friends, teachers, special education resource teachers, professors, therapists, etc. etc.) who have been a part of my life thus far and who have supported me to be the person I am today and the person I am to become in the future. I hope that I can continue to have you in my life for the next 28 years of my life!

Tuesday, July 13, 2004

Click here to hear a portion of Brian's conclusion from his Communication Strategies for Persons with Speech Impairments presentation from Tools for Life.
this is an audio post - click to play

Sunday, July 11, 2004


Brian on the way to present looking a bit nervous!

Brian feeling relief after the workshop
Tools For Life day! Woke up a bit nervous, but anxious to do my presentation with my friend Sterling. Ate a little breakfast, and got dressed to look the part of a presenter.

Why do I dress up? Well, I feel that if one takes pride in looking presentable, the audience will hopefully appreciate the effort that went into it and will know that you, the presenter, are serious about the presentation. I enjoy "dressing up" - how often do you get an opportunity to wear a tie in Hawaii?! So I took full advantage of it.

Arrive at TFL, Sterling, "Gee, are you trying to upstage me?!" No, not at all...I realize that YOU, Sterling, are the established one in the community and I'm striving to get to where you are at! So, in no way was I attempting to upstage anyone.

Presentation went great! Sterling did a fantastic job sharing his knowledge on the causes of speech impairments and what strategies are available. Then it was my turn....In life, you NEED people who support and believe in your abilities, even when you might not. I am so very fortunate to have this in Sterling. In the two opportunities I've presented with him, he has taken it upon himself to make sure I "shine" as best I can. I am forever grateful for this. Other people who make me "shine" so very brightly, of course, include my parents.

I felt proud being able to present today. I put in a lot of effort into making my presentation be the best that I could make it. Did it go off without a hitch? No! Did I overcome the minor glitches, most definitely. It's called keeping cool while in the middle of a fire storm. For a moment, I thought I might have made a mistake in my recording the second MP3 file. It turned out to be a unexpected pause, that somehow happened. Luckily I was able to simply unpause it and continue on. A simple shrug on my part summed it up well!

After my presentation, I went to watch and support my mentor's presentation (Dr. Jim Skouge). He always, always gives awesome presentations that are so very informative and thought-provoking. Shame on the schedulers for giving him the last slot of the event, but hey, this lends credence to the saying "saving the best for last!" Sometimes in life, you wonder why certain people enter your world, but I've figured out Jim entered to take me under his wing and teach me to take my abilities to a higher level. As I mentioned to Jim the other day, I am grateful each day that I am able to spend with him, and am even more thankful that he HAS entered my life. He says he gains a lot from me, but I gain a whole lot more from him. His passion for his career is something to behold; some might view it as being too involved in one's job. Hogwash! If everyone had the same passion as Jim has, the world would be such a better place.

Once TFL concluded, my friend, Aletha and I decided to go have some fun together. We made a joint decision (don't argue, just go with it Aletha!) to eat at the Dixie Grill. During our time together, I made a comment that I've begun to try and model my work ethic after Jim's. I truly mean this. My night out with Aletha was just awesome! Her company is so much fun, and we actually can co-exist well, which is a bonus! We both enjoyed some beverages, and the fun that comes along with that! But, throughout it all, we both maintained our wits and had great conversation. I ordered ribs, and a breakthrough of sorts happened! I communicated MYSELF that I'd like my ribs taken off the bone to our waiter, who was very receptive and said, "sure thing!" I think this was the FIRST time I used my talker in a public place to communicate with a complete stranger, and it went fine!

During dinner, Aletha and I talked about a whole range of topics! Very good conversation and I'll leave it at that. Sometimes people have an ability to make you feel comfortable and at ease...Aletha is such a person. Larry's a lucky person...nuff said.

After Dixie Grill, we walked on over to Ward Theater Complex. Unforunately, Anchorman was filled, and I made a quick judgment call (Aletha, you gotta give me props for being decisive!!) to forgo the movie and just hang out at Dave & Busters. D&B's Roof area was supposedly closed to the general public, but what fun would life be if you always listened to rules?! So, up we went to the roof level....Aletha hesitantly behind me. Did we get busted? NO! In fact, we enjoyed almost a full 2 hours of simply sitting down and enjoying each other's company. Who needs a movie when you can see a marriage reception going on, with a bunch of happy guys and girls frolicking in the darkened corner of the rooftop?! And there we were, taking all of this in visually...thinking, "why would anyone choose D&B's for a reception!?!" Ah, to each their own.

Feeling a bit drained, and sensing Aletha was ready to call it a night, we headed on out. Caught "Mom's Taxi" and dropped Aletha off at the parking lot...hopefully she wasn't locked in! If she was, I give her my full permission to beat me up!

Thanks Aletha, for a wonderful night out. Thanks Sterling for a great presentation experience. Thanks Jim for being a guiding presence in my life. Thanks Bruce, of Dynavox Systems, for providing me with the power of verbal communication - should I CHOOSE to use it, and believe me I am! Thanks Mom and Dad for just doing what you do, day in and day out!

Sleep awaits me now!